Highs and Lows

To be completely honest, I have been procrastinating with uploading something on here. I didn't want to post because the past two weeks were not very exciting so I was scared that I would disappoint anyone reading. Plus, I've been very emotional recently because I am starting to miss home. There have been other things going on here that haven't made the experience the best either. So, I have been waiting for something really exciting to write about. I have finally found some things to say!

This last week and a half has been very rough for me emotionally. Last Wednesday, my little brother moved away from home to begin his college experience. This is such a huge time in his life that I am missing out on because I am on the other side of the world. He has been there for almost all of the important things that have happened in my life and I missed one of the biggest ones of his. My brother and I are enrolled in the same college. I love and hate our conversations where he tells me everything that is happening on campus. It really sucks that I am not there for his first trimester. I have been in contact with a lot of my friends and family throughout the week giving me too many mood swings.

Before coming here, I had several conversations with the girls who had done this study abroad program. I was told numerous times that this program would be tough. I remember one girl saying, “If you can get through this program, you can get through anything”. I don’t know why but I have been taking their words with a grain of salt. I have seen some really troubling things here but none of them were things I couldn’t handle.  Sunday was the most mentally and emotionally draining day I have had here. I had to go somewhere I never thought I would have to go: the hospital. I am fine, health wise. I went to support someone who is becoming very important to me. I will not go into detail about what exactly was wrong with them. Pretty much, after several visits to the clinic, it was decided to that getting the person to the hospital was needed.

There were so many things that I witnessed and experienced that day that I wish I had not. We went straight to the ER when we got there. Unfortunately, we could not enter the doors because we did not have a slip to get in. After about 20-30 minutes we were able to get the slip and a stretcher. Stepping through those doors was overwhelming, there were so many stretchers and people in there. They don’t have curtains so you saw everything. They don’t have space so every available space is occupied by people in the rooms and hallways. You can’t get a stretcher unless you have an ID so a lot of patients just laid on the floor. Doctors/nurses do not navigate patients through the hospital so the people with the patient are responsible for pushing the stretchers around. After getting in, the doctors checked the patient then told us to wait. A little later, we were given prescriptions. After walking to the pharmacists, we realized that we were there to pick up needles and medicine. That still blows my mind. My heart nearly broke when I saw an elderly women screaming as her deceased brother was wheeled out of the hospital on a stretcher. The man was barely covered with a sheet. After returning back to the emergency room entrance about twenty minutes later, the body was still just lying on the stretcher in the middle of the walkway unattended from what I could tell. I saw a child urinate in the middle of the hallway while no one said anything. I witnessed the nurse check on more than four patients without changing her gloves. She administered medicine, took notes and touched them all with the same gloves. The still cannot believe everything I saw. If I get sick, God forbid, I am going straight home or Europe because I can't fathom the thought of being a patient in that hospital.

In happier news, I have a new favorite store. It is seriously is the store of my dreams. It's really touristy but whatever, it gets the job done. There are really cute clothes and jewelry. I really love how cheap they are. I bought five pairs of pants, four shirts, two rings and a pair of earrings for 1700 rupees which is about 28 USD. I went back the next day with the rest of the girls and of course I ended up buyng something. I bought two pillowcases and a large mat that I plan on using to decorate my room in America. I also, what things I want to buy my family and friends back at home. 

Also, the girls and I are finally making friends around our age which I can honestly say is making my time here so much better. The other night, one of the other girls and I went to dinner with friends. We rode around on there bikes, which was so much fun. I had never been on a bike until coming to India. Bikes in America terrify me because they go so fast but here they excite me. I can now say that I have been on 5 bikes! It was Ivy's first bike ride. She had the biggest smile on her face from start to end. On our way home, she was so excited that she actually started screaming. Two nights ago, we went out again with more friends. We started by riding around BHU. Then we wanted to experience being on one on the highway, so that happened. We drove to the middle of the Ganga Bridge where we just looked at the water for a while. Then we went to dinner, really good by the way. We then went back to the bridge for a few minutes. We ended our night by sitting at Assi Ghat. Last night, we walked around with the guys to try different street foods. I was so nervous the whole time because I thought one of us would get sick since we were advised not to trust street food. I woke up fine this morning so I guess it is safe enough. Then of course, we went to another ghat. I am so glad we made some friends because I have seen so many parts of Varanasi in the last few days that I never knew existed. 

I have recently returned home from my vocal class. Usually I am given a ride home but there is a concert being hosted at her place so I took a rickshaw. My teacher's father insisted that I take a cycle rickshaw. Cycle rickshaws make me feel so uncomfortable but I didn't want to argue. I feel so bad for the men (especially the elder men) peddling while carrying the weight of their passengers for so little money. Anyways, we had to go over a small hill so he had to get off of the bike and push. Even though we agreed on a price, I gave him more because I felt bad for him. Tomorrow, we will be going on an outing with Rajat and our Hindi teachers to Ramnagar to visit a fort and to also see Ramlila which tells the story of Rama. This  should be interesting because their is never a dull moment with us girls and our teachers.